Essay Instructions: My name is Yoonki Chang,
I would like to get back this paper at 5:00 pm today (1/19/2009). I am an international student from Korea. I try to transfer to the university. I little bit wrote my information to write this application essay. You can get my information through attaching personal statement and states of purpose. The essay should be about 600 words using my information. Please, think about written conventions (grammar, spelling, punctuation, apitalization),
word choice (efficiency, clarity, and variety of words), sentence fluency (correction of awkward phrases, run-on sentences), overall organization (paragraph and essay structure).
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Please write an essay, approximately 500-700 words (typically one page).
Topic:
Thomas Edison failed many times before successfully inventing the modern electric light bulb. He said, "If I find 10,000 ways something won't work, I haven't failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward." Reflect on an accomplishment you achieved in an unlikely way.
------------------------------------------------------------This information will be helpful for writing essay below. (This is my(Yoonki Chang) all information)
I was born in 1980. Most of my ages graduated from college, and they work in some companies.
I was three times to try applied university in Korea, but I failed to go to the university.
I tried to find my aptitude, but I found my aptitude through a lot of failures such as athletics (golf), music (playing soprano saxophone), cooking and playing the part of an actor.
I was not interested in studying, but I finally found to study economics which is my aptitude through I read books and newspaper. I know I was backward in other people who were my age to attend the company. In this reason, People around me make me feel more depressed because of my failures. However, I never give up my dream which is finance analyst. It was difficult at first to study in the United States for various reasons such as language barrier and culture difference. So, I cannot get good grades for most courses when I attended in Skagit Valley College and first semester in Santa Monica College. However, I have successfully overcome these difficulties. I believe that my military life provides me challenging mind, and this experience gave me motive like Thomas Edison. I never think about failure when I do something, and I am always optimistic. I strongly believe proverbs such as “Slow and steady wins the race” and “Mistakes breed success.” I do not think that I failed every time to do my work because I think that it is processing to approach my dream even if I wasted time to reach my dream job because of failure. I believe that it is good experiences. I am not disappointed by a lot of failure.
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(This is my personal statement and states of purpose)
I have a career plan to become a reputed financial analyst. A financial analyst is a well paid and reputed professional in Korea, and I wish to establish myself as a top class financial analyst.
Since a financial analyst position requires to be versed in such fields as economy and statistics along with good understanding of finance, I want to study economics as my major. Given my strong interest in economy and analytical mind, studying economics also goes well with my character and aptitude.
I entered a community college in the United States in 2006 as business major. The first year at the community college was a kind of my adjustment period for the United States student life. I think I quite successfully settled to into the new environment, and became confident in pursuing my academic goals in the United States.
With this confidence in studying business, I wish to study economics at your esteemed university. I am sure that my hard working nature, passion and enthusiasm for the study of economics will enable me to make an excellent scholar at the University.
Following that, I want to receive a prestigious education by at the University, a university highly regarded for its history and tradition in teaching economics and business to top students all over the world. I hope to nurture my ability at your institution and become a great asset to the society. In addition to acquiring basic knowledge in the field of your choice, I firmly believe that experiences in diverse areas are equally important in realizing one’s potential. My cooperative and leadership skills that I earned while in school and work will allow me to adapt to the environment of the University.
It is my belief that actual experience is more valuable than learning by books. While serving in Defense Security Command (Korean military) for 26 months, I harnessed my patience and confidence in my ability to overcome any life difficulties. The military services provided me with an opportunity to look back seriously on what I had done at school and in my personal life previously. With the experience and learning from the hardships, perseverance, personal relationships, fellowships in the military life, I was able to see things from different perspectives and in more matured ways. It made me feel sorry for the time I wasted in the past.
Through the military life and various part-time jobs I had taken occasionally including Wal-Mart Korea and Lotte Department Store, I realized that I had a great interest in working with people and doing business. When I worked at Wal-Mart and Lotte Department Store along with many people of different ages and background, I observed that effective communication skills with coworkers were critical in achieving any planned goals. I often took on active roles in narrowing differences in opinion and conflicts among coworkers, enabling our team to achieve the planned goals. Even though these were part-time jobs, I could get a taste of management and business in which I found a great satisfaction.
Through the business experience, however, I realized that my knowledge on economy was very limited. I strongly desired to learn more about economy in a systematical and extensive way so that I could be a competent financial analyst in the future. I am confident that my experiences in business, passion and enthusiasm for studying economics will be instrumental in pursuing my academic goals.
In addition to my academic goals, I discovered what it takes to be a leader and the importance of considering other people while attending Santa Monica College. I participated in many activities including helping the underprivileged. Through these activities, I could foster altruistic mind for people and the community to which I belong, not just pursuing my academic ambitions.
Although it was difficult at first to study in the United States for various reasons such as language barrier and culture difference, I have successfully overcome these difficulties. I am really turning on a new leaf here in the United States. I find my school life here challenging but enjoyable and rewarding, and strongly wish to move on to your esteemed university to achieve both my academic and personal goals.
I have applied to University for its celebrated history. I strongly believe that University will provide me a great environment and curriculum in pursuing a career as a financial analyst. To that end, I will invest my time and effort in studying finance related subjects as well as reading books on business management, strategies and autobiographies of successful entrepreneurs. Moreover, I will continue to be active in volunteer works and participation in various school clubs. I hope to exchange and interact with people from all walks of life. Finally, I hope to become a proud student member of the University to uphold the tradition and prestigious name of your institution.
There are faxes for this order.